Caught Chexting; New Slang To Speed Up Your Life
Evan has never funded any international terrorism. He is a patriot, though his mom once told him his beard made him look like a terrorist. That hurt his feelings...a lot. You can visit him at his house or at http://evankessler.com. You can also follow him on twitter at @ekessdotcom
The birth of the occasional slang term is anything but a rare linguistic phenomenon. Since the inception of language there have been plenty of instances where persons have been entirely too lazy to finish saying words or describe things using a full sentence, instead opting to create new words (or even abbreviations) to make the act of expression far less taxing on their own tongues. What they fail to realize is that often times this new slang term takes longer to decipher for the rest of us and is much more of a waste of time than taking four additional seconds to say what you mean.
Today we noticed the emergence of the new slang term, “chexting” making the rounds at a few publications. We had no idea what this meant at first. Perhaps it was the act of Chinese and Mexican people sending text messages to one another. It also sounded like it could have banking implications, like you could wire someone money from your checking account via text using the new “chexting” option from Chase.
Upon further review, the aforementioned guesstimates were wrong. “Chexting” actually refers to cheating on your significant other via text. Chexting has reared it’s ugly head thanks to both the Sandra Bullock-Jesse James scandal and the Tiger Woods sex addiction spectacular, but isn’t it basically the same as sexting? As in, “he was sexting with another woman.” End of story. No new word needed.
Either way, as long as people are coming out with pointless slang terms, we figured why not put our stamp on a few of our own. So without further ado, here’s some pointless slang.
1. Hotzi: Also a product of the Sandra Bullock-Jesse James scandal. It refers to thinking someone is totally hot, only to discover they have Nazi leanings.
2. Chexican: Mexican Cuisine made by Chinese people, frequently in NY restaurants with names like Happy Taco and Yummy Taco.
3. Nopology: Skillfully giving the appearance that you’ve made an apology without actually apologizing.
4. Facebreak: Notifying a significant other of your deteriorated relationship via Facebook status update.
5. Pibswich: A Peanut Butter Sandwich.
6. Eurrorist: A European Terrorist
7. Glockblock- Someone who prevents you from scoring with a lady because they’re brandishing a firearm.
8. Slexting- Texting someone while on a sled.
9. Scientolist- A Scientologist who is also also a scientist.
10. Freepublican- A Republican who loves freedom.
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