Dancing: Is It Really That Fun?

by Colt Brechtel

It’s the worldwide fad that refuses to die: dancing.  People from vastly different cultures regularly engage in the practice and seem to truly enjoy it.  It has been the subject of many of our nation’s most beloved films like Dirty Dancing, Save the Last Dance, Footloose (soon to be remade), and of course, You Got Served.  However, there is a small section of society that is not so fond of the institution.  A young adult, who has requested not to be identified, is speaking out on the craze that he believes is not as fun as they say.  This incredibly charming, intelligent, and impressive young man has trouble understanding the phenomenon:

“I don’t get dancing.  Really, I don’t get anyone who does something other than standing around somewhat uncomfortably when loud music is playing.  I reluctantly participate, but its appeal is beyond me.”

Loud music has been the driving force behind the dancing movement since its conception.  Often, a song and dance will come packaged together.  This was the case with “The Twist” by Chubby Checker, “Do The Hustle” by Van McCoy, “The Macarena” by Los Del Rio, and “Crank That (Soldier Boy)” by Soldier Boy.  Sadly, generations are often defined by their embarrassing, universally known routines.  One thing is for certain though: as music gets racier, so do the dances.  The bright, insightful young man mentioned earlier is quite appalled by the vulgarity he sees when he walks onto the floor:

“The style seems to increase in obscenity every few years.  There used to be a good 2-3 feet separating partners, then it went down to six inches, and now the standing dry hump is standard.  If this trend continues, we’ll soon see the utter calamity known as daggering in every American dance club.  If you don’t know what daggering is, consider yourself lucky.”

Most modern dancing occurs at house parties, bars, social clubs, and the occasional sporting event.  One ingredient that is present at all of these locations is alcohol.  There is a theory that cites alcoholism as the main cause of dancing.  Others believe the inverse, that dancing is actually the cause of alcoholism.  Studies show that many awkward kids grow dependent on inebriates as they make pathetic attempts to interact socially with members of the opposite sex.  The strikingly handsome young man referenced before is just one example of those faced with this tragic plight:

“Without alcohol, dancing doesn’t happen for me.  It helps me forget that I’m in a crowd of strangers, looking at the ground, and wiggling foolishly.  If I didn’t have to dance, my liver would be far healthier overall.”