The List: Nails in the Coffin - Top 30 Career Suicides

10. Joaquin Phoenix - On October 27, 2008 he said “BYE GOOD” to acting to pursue a rapping career, which apparently includes adopting the ‘Hobo Joe’ chic look.  Take that FUBU!

9. Larry Craig - Who knew that tap dancing in the bathroom could ever get you into so much trouble? I tap my feet on the toilet all the time, but that might explain why most of my visits to public restrooms end in homoerotic experiences and out fifty bucks.

8. Macaulay Culkin - Nothing kills the career of a child star faster than growing patchy facial haired puberty.  Quirkily cute kids like Culkin almost always grow up to be quirkily not-cute adults.  Throw pubescent nuptials and a few too many sleepovers at Neverland Ranch into the mix, and you’ve gone from Home Alone to home alone with no one calling.

7. Chris Brown- We’re all still waiting for his duet with Ike Turner, “You’re, Once, Twice, Three times a Punching Bag.”

6. Steve Irwin - He was a fearless man who kept all living creatures close to his heart.  But as much as he loved all, none would ever have a special place in his heart the same way the short-tail stingray did… It is rumored that moments before he died he cried out fervidly “Croikey!”