Entries by Johnny Wright


Big Boy Donny’s Birthday Party

“I want a ball, I want a party Pink macaroons and a million balloons And performing baboons, Give it to me, Now!” ~ Veruca Salt Read Episode 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House…Episode 6 “FUCK CARROTS!!!” That’s what President Donald Trump yelled as he squeezed the […]


President Trump Welcomes the First Pet

“Black crows in the meadow Across a broad highway Though it’s funny, honey I just don’t feel much like a Scarecrow today” ~ Bob Dylan, “Black Crow Blues” Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House… Episode 5.                                       […]


Mike Pence Returns to The Crossroads

“I went to the crossroads, fell down on my knees, Asked the Lord above ‘have mercy, now save poor Bob, if you please.’” ~ Robert Johnson, “Cross Road Blues” Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House… (pt 5)   (read pt 1 here) Two new White House interns are nervously awaiting a meeting in the Cabinet Room. […]


Goodbye to the Cancer Moonshot

“Some of those that work forces, are the same that burn crosses.” ~ Zack de la Rocha, “Killing in the Name”   Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House…   “You have the target?” “Have the target. Pussy hat. Sign with black background, rainbow-colored letters. Distance?” “Two hundred twenty-one yards.” “Wind?” “Seven miles per hour, from […]


Trump’s New Rules

Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House… Meeting in the Roosevelt Room, President Trump is gathered with members of the senior staff and a handful of National Security analysts. Elise Kemp, a twenty-seven year old analyst waits patiently for Chief Strategist Steve Bannon to finish his thoughts on the “Jewy-lookin guy” that works as a steward […]


Mr. Trump Goes to Washington

Meanwhile, in Donald Trump’s White House… The next President of the United States surveys the Oval Office, and he immediately begins demanding changes. “I want the Red Phone back,” Trump says. White House Chief of Staff Reince Priebus shifts into his trying-to-not-sound-condescending voice and says, “Mr. President, the Red Phone wasn’t actually real. That was […]



It’s is difficult to remember the small events that preceded the Clown War. Now 2021, two years since war was declared, the events of the autumn of 2016 feel the same as Vietnam and Watergate.  I am trapped in the Ivar’s Acres of Clams fish and chips stand on Pier 54 of the Seattle Waterfront, […]


Trump Snarls

Two hours after his latest victory sort-of-speech following a state primary, just before midnight, Donald J. Trump was in the apartment on his private plane flying at cruising altitude back to Manhattan. Only small lamps were needed to illuminate the room as the light bounced off the gold walls to provide a warm din bright […]