Tinkle into the dishwasher’s detergent container.
Pop up and down on the kitchen window-sill , hoping to give the gardening widow next door a heart attack.
Lunch with MILF On The Shelf.
Sufficiently liquored up, try the “You’re standing under the mistle-blow.” line on the MILF On The Shelf.
Promise to call the MILF On The Shelf back “after the holidays”, secure in the knowledge that I’ll be in a box in the attic by then.
Chase the dog around the house.
Take some of the mom’s purse coke, and hide it in the daughter’s jean pockets.
Get back on the shelf.
Intentionally fall off of the shelf and scare the crap out of everybody.