Simple HMO Advice

Mr. Smith goes to the doctor’s office for his wife’s test results. The lab tech told him, “I’m sorry sir, but there has been a mix-up. When we sent the sample from your wife to the lab, a sample from another Mrs. Smith was also sent, and now we’re uncertain which one is your wife’s. Frankly, the news is either bad or terrible.”

“What do you mean?” asked the concerned spouse.

“Well,” the medic explained, “one Mrs. Smith tested positive for Alzheimer’s disease and the other for AIDS.”

“Can we do the test over?” the husband cried.

“Normally, but your HMO won’t pay for these expensive tests more than once,” said the technician.

“Well, what am I supposed to do now?” Mr. Smith demanded.

The lab tech replied, “The HMO recommends that you drop your wife off in the middle of the woods. If she finds her way home, don’t fuck her.”