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What Will it Take to Get Anthony Weiner to Stop Sexting?

There are only a few viable scenarios that appear likely:

 

His penis falls off. While trying to take a photo of the severed member to send to a lady, his iPhone explodes, killing him instantly.

 


 

Sexting becomes illegal and punishable by death in America. Anthony moves to Tijuana, where his penis is stung by killer bees while sexting. After taking a pic of his swollen, infected genitalia and texting it to his child’s baby-sitter, he falls into a painful fever and dies soon thereafter.

 


 

Anthony is sent to prison for being gross, and is denied access to an iPhone. While attempting to telepathically send a mental image of his penis to the underage daughter of the warden, he is disemboweled with a tuna can lid by a fellow inmate.

 


 

Tired off all this nonsense, Superman finally throws Anthony Weiner into the Phantom Zone. After attempting to text a photo of his penis to Doomsday and General Zod, he is torn to pieces immediately.

 


 

Written by Kit Lively

Kit Lively

Ain’t It Cool News said of Kit, “If Gary Larson is Bill Cosby, then Kit is Richard Pryor.” That’s a great quote, right? Man, I love that quote! That was, until Bill Cosby turned out to be a deplorable serial rapist. Now the quote isn’t worth shit, even though my name isn’t linked directly to Cosby’s! Thanks a lot Bill, you jackass. Not only have you ruined dozens of lives with your rapey ways, but you’ve ruined a perfectly good quote as well. I hope you rot in Hell, you scumbag.
Anyway, Kit’s cartoons have been published by lots of humor magazines, etc. etc. yadda yadda. (sigh)….

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